Mind, Heart, and Body
Today's soundtrack:
Dave Brubeck '64/'66
Today before the last meeting of the day at 5:45, we slipped down to the Sawmill River for a quick swim. The water is low and slow, so it made for a nice lolling ride on an inner tube around the bend to where it is deep enough to float freely. One can slip in just beyond a fallen tree and after getting hung up on a few rocks hit a short stretch of open water.
Even on hot days like we've been having, the river is refreshingly, bracingly cold. Not quite Cape Cod cold, but it does take time to get acclimated and you have to ready yourself before jumping fully in. I suppose this could be a metaphor for so many things, but tonight it is late and I've just finished sending my last emails and closed out my last Zoom at 8:30. Soon it will be time for a late summer meal. But for now, I can open the windows and relish the cool night air, listen to Eugene Wright, Joe Morello, Paul Desmond, and Dave Brubeck and hammer out some last thoughts.
The last meeting of the day was with some colleagues at UMass Amherst where we were using the Popular Education model to explore possible responses to the pandemic and explore ways to strengthen anti-racism work. My Zoom breakout room had a weighty cautious start. I think we were all listening and trying to read cues from one another on how to proceed. We talked about how our mind, heart, and body were reacting to the circumstances. One of the things I shared had to do with how protective I've been of my heart. Out of self-preservation, I think I've walled off my heart from feeling too intensely.
Now, that is not entirely true. I certainly feel deeply, and at times feel too intensely, but it is also true that I find I need to be careful, I need to distance myself from visceral anger, visceral disgust, visceral dismay, because I do not know how I could stand it if I let those things take seat in my heart, soul, and psyche. I was moved in my group by a woman who shared almost nothing. She talked about being at peace. She talked about how she has been demonstrating and experiencing police violence all her life, that this is nothing new for her. Her state relayed the dichotomy of our nation at this time, the multiple realities demarcated by race, the hierarchy of white supremacy, and the horrifyingly wide spectrum ranging from people who have just come to realize the state of the nation, to people who have lived the experience as part of their daily existence and are weary of the "novel" conversation that pervades these spaces.
I exist at neither extreme, but sit in that middle ground of less easily definable people of color. Not a simple dichotomy of White or Black, but a between, a borderland of bodies that is easily passed over, ignored, or tokenized. A few weeks ago my father texted all his family members to warn them to be careful in public because of the random xenophobic attacks by people who blame Asians for the pandemic. But before then, one of my daughter's friends was attacked in Boston and sent to the hospital. Another friend of mine in Denver had insults and bottles hurled at her while riding her bicycle down the street. How do we discern what is random craziness, and what is the welling of the same hatred that feeds white supremacist culture? And what does it matter to list these things except that the reality of existence is different for BIPOC.
Several times in the last week or so, I've had a couple of BIPOC colleagues say that they were too tired to keep talking about the issues. I was charged with convening a meeting of BIPOC faculty and staff to discuss their needs and concerns at the college around race. They talked about being tired of being called upon to come up with solutions. I can empathize. I am tired too, and while selfishly I find a sense of purpose in the work I do on diversity, equity, and inclusions, on dismantling a white supremacist culture, and helping the college become an explicitly anti-racist institution, there are also moments of exasperation. I think I do pretty well working with people who are engaged in the same work, but for people who are just becoming aware, or do not have the first level of tools needed to approach this work with their students, their colleagues, or their own curriculum, that feels like a whole different endeavor, one I am not equipped to engage in.
But maybe I need to be. Maybe that is what the next level of work entails. I wonder if I've rested too much on the laurels of people who are my closest allies, the ones who are now too tired to continue. Maybe the focus need to be at the beginning. What is the developmental approach to developing an anti-racist institution?
To be honest, I grew tired too. Several years ago, I felt the people who were supposed to be my allies at the college were my greatest obstacles. They were territorial, mean, and unaware of their own biases. It drove me away from diversity work... for years. It wasn't just a matter of months, it was a long span of time. Maybe seven years? It worries me that the exasperation we may inspire might be not just temporary, but career long. It nearly was for me.
So my challenge now, is to respect the cumulative trauma of the moment, allow people the space to exist as they need to... but also to hold open space for people to participate where they want to and how they would like to. To enable agency and self determination, and to try not to let the cumulative mistakes and institutional baggage to discourage their passion for this work as much as it did for me.
Close you eyes.
Listen to your mind, heart, and body.
Leo
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The Sawmill River
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From Our Friends:
From the UMass CNS:
Join us for our next Zoom webinar, Seed to Plate: Evolving Sustainable Agriculture for Healthy Communities, on Monday, June 29 at 12pm, EST.
This webinar features a discussion with industry experts who will reveal how farming approaches have changed and how UMass faculty and alumni are evolving concepts of sustainability. Our panelists will discuss:
Participants are invited to submit questions for discussion upon registering; the panel will do their best to answer as many questions as possible in the time allotted.
Registration is required to obtain a link to the event, and can be done by visiting umass.science/seedtoplate.
From MA Sustainable Communities and Campuses:
CONFERENCE
Sustainability in the Days of Coronavirus
Communities and campuses are adjusting to the pandemic
with sustainability and social justice in mind. Topics include:
leadership, food, diversity, health, and energy.
Friday, June 26, 9am-2pm
Register Here FREE. Limited to 100. Agenda |
From Teaching Tolerance:
We’re Hosting Virtual Professional Development Workshops!
During the pandemic, our expert trainers are unable to see educators in person. So our PD workshops are going virtual. Register today to learn more about addressing inequities at your school, facilitating critical conversations and integrating our Social Justice Standards in your work.
Today's Online Teaching Tips:
From Pearson:
You and educators around the world are being asked to rethink what learning will look like for millions of students — this Fall and in the future. And the only thing we do know about the Fall term is that none of us know quite what to expect.
That means you’re also tasked with planning for every possible scenario, including fully online learning, smaller class sizes, flexible schedules, HyFlex models, and intermittent campus closures. On top of that, you’re looking for ways to help ensure you and your students not only cope, but thrive under these new circumstances.
No matter what your plans and concerns are, or how they might change from day to day throughout each term, we can help you prepare.
From ConexED:
Read the Bellevue College case study to see how connecting with their instructor in real time helped students increase not only their participation—but also their grades.
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From Magna:
From Invoke Learning:
Even on hot days like we've been having, the river is refreshingly, bracingly cold. Not quite Cape Cod cold, but it does take time to get acclimated and you have to ready yourself before jumping fully in. I suppose this could be a metaphor for so many things, but tonight it is late and I've just finished sending my last emails and closed out my last Zoom at 8:30. Soon it will be time for a late summer meal. But for now, I can open the windows and relish the cool night air, listen to Eugene Wright, Joe Morello, Paul Desmond, and Dave Brubeck and hammer out some last thoughts.
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